These observations were written not by Rafe himself, but by his close friend, with whom he exchanged 8 random facts. So thanks to Arthur Jackson, who apologized for the lengthiness, but in his not sparing of words, has produced 8+ brilliant, dead on observations about my wonderful husband.
To be acquainted with Rafe is to be most likely humored, probably perplexed, perhaps even put off (haha), or maybe just indifferent. But to really know him is to... well, love him. The fortunate among us know him well.
- It is not enough to say that Rafe is good in social situations. Rafe is so gifted socially that he enables society among those who would otherwise not speak two words together. His socially dysfunctionate friends (myself included, although I am by no means alone) require and learn to request his presence as a social crutch. This is why Rex Blankenship, quite socially challenged, takes him on road trips to pick up foreign missionaries he does not know. This is why Rex and I refuse to interview a prospective music minister over lunch when Rafe cannot come along. This is why Rafe feels a very real obligation to not miss his grad school classes...his professors (one in particular) know very well that the class is frustratingly aloof when Rafe is absent. Take Rafe out of any society, no matter how well or po0rly it is functioning, and it immediately worsens. He is "the life" of parties in much the same way that the Spirit is the life of the church--he allows fellowship between individuals and groups who would, bereft of his presence, have nothing to do with one another.
- Rafe is in awe of the relationships God has made possible between man and beast, especially dogs. One of the things he appreciates most about dogs (or regrets in poorly trained dogs) is their ability (or lack thereof) to socially perform. His dog, Rhoda, pleases him most when she relates well to house guests or to people (or dogs) she does not know. Rafe's desires to extend his social prowess to his dog are mirrored in similar desires for his children. It is surprising to learn how much thought he puts into discerning how to free them to relate to people with all aspects of their personalities. When his kids, for example, are shy (they are becoming less so), he is disappointed because so much of their real selves is not being made available to those wishing to relate to them.
- Rafe is not a big TV watcher but he never misses the sports portion of his late local news. He knows it comes on at 10:23 PM and is aggravated when I call at this time. But his favorite television program is, by far, "Judge Mathis." He would watch it daily if it came on at a more convenient time. There have been stretches where he has, for months on end, gone home for lunch everyday so that he can watch it.
- Rafe has a strange habit (I've been told he gets it from his father) of purposefully mispronouncing the names of people (often celebrities) that he knows good and well how to pronounce. He, then, waits/asks for you to correct him. He does this primarily when he is the one bringing them up in conversation. "Seinfield," "Bono" with long o's, (I cannot properly convey his mispronunciations of "Beyonce"). These are not great examples, but his mispronunciations are so random (how could you mispronounce that name?!) that they are difficult to remember. He has now passed this on to his older daughter, who just the other day told my wife that she had just seen her cousin Amy at the library...she pronounced "Amy"--this is ridiculous--with a short "a" (like in ham). She did this despite just telling me the same story and pronouncing "Amy" correctly. Note: Not all of Rafe's mispronunciations are on purpose.
- Rafe is certain that he is spiritually ready for God to grant him a lot of money.
- Rafe loves preying harmlessly on the fears and insecurities of his friends. He most often does this with lies. Tell Rafe you are afraid of something and he will instantly make up a story that reinforces your fears (he loves to do this to my wife.) Betray to him a social insecurity and he will instantly make up things that will make you feel even more awkward (he loves to do this to Jeff Miller.) There is an almost undetectable change in his demeanor when he is lying in this way (I always know when he's doing it), but I cannot place what it is.
- Rafe is extraordinarily cool. There is not much that staggers him. There is no topic you can bring up that will throw him. He will say anything, and he will admit things about himself that no one else would ever admit. He is absolutely unembarrassable. Even when Rafe is heavily displaced or stressed, no one can tell.
- Rafe thinks that his wife has never been better looking than last Sunday. "Mark the date: June 9, 2007." I have been out of town this week so this fact may now be a little dated. [This one's embarrassing to post. But he did say something like that when we were leaving church Sunday:) Thanks, dear, for helping me cope with turning 30. You don't look so bad yourself.]
8++ Rafe and art: Rafe is profoundly emotionally affected by art. He does not enjoy how long a powerful movie can affect his mood. His primary complaint against a certain painting that Lauren likes is that it "depresses him." Nevertheless, Rafe's taste in art is very good and objective, although not as catholic as I would like. He loves a good book but he does not enjoy reading. He loves a good movie but despises movie theatres (see 8+). Above all art, Rafe loves music. He appreciates great albums and refuses to listen to songs out of the context of the album they are on. He dislikes ipods because they make listening to single after single all too easy.
So there you have it. 8+ things you may not have known about THE best husband and dad in the world. (Happy Father's Day!)
